This winter has been one for the record books, it has been one of the wettest and coldest I can remember. It is wonderful for the drought that has plague California and Nevada for so long but has left me in a “funk.”
I don’t know if I should toss it up to the weather or the fact, I have had more life changing health conditions that will be on going for me. I’m thinking that both have a lot to do with my funk. On a lot of days this winter I’ve given myself pep talks and pray like I had never before. This is not like me, this funk, this no energy or wanting to embrace the seasons in my life. Then as I was reflecting on these feelings, I realized that perhaps yes, a lot has happened the last few months and yes this “funk” is with me, but it won’t define me. I may have cancer, but it has given me a new perspective on life. Cancer is not a death sentence; it is a life sentence; it pushes me to truly live in a way I have never before. So, I acknowledge my “funk” that I’m in and validate it, doing so is when I feel free and at peace. Extending grace and validating feelings sitting in the season of winter is the fastest way to healing.
Pep talks and prayer do work but for me the time I chose to be still and reflect giving grace to myself is when the winter of my soul began to thaw and heal. I think it is amazing that in the stillness of this season is where I am fining more growth so that I can embrace this season in my life, it has been hard but that’s when the most growth happens. I needed this winter of quiet and reflection so I am ready for my spring, when ever that may be.
Just like this winter has been one for the record books so has this time in my life. I have always enjoyed this passage in the Bible, perhaps you will too.
A Time for Everything Ecclesiastes 3:1-22
1 For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven:
2 a time to be born, and a time to die;
a time to plant, and a time to pluck up what is planted;
3 a time to kill, and a time to heal;
a time to break down, and a time to build up;
4 a time to weep, and a time to laugh;
a time to mourn, and a time to dance;
5 a time to cast away stones, and a time to gather stones together;
a time to embrace, and a time to refrain from embracing;
6 a time to seek, and a time to lose;
a time to keep, and a time to cast away;
7 a time to tear, and a time to sew;
a time to keep silence, and a time to speak;
8 a time to love, and a time to hate;
a time for war, and a time for peace.